Closer looks at Steve Scalise running for Speaker and George Santos indicted again from Colbert, Meyers, and Kimmel

I'm returning to the fallout from Kevin "Pickled Tongue" McCarthy being ousted as Speaker of the House, which I haven't covered since Friday's Colbert, Meyers, and Kimmel turn their attention to Matt Gaetz. The House needed a break and so did I. I begin with Stephen Colbert's monologue, Scalise Nabs House Speaker Nom | George Santos Scammed His Own Donors | Bigfoot Found!

Rep. Steve Scalise is the GOP’s nominee for Speaker of the House, Rep. George Santos faces new federal charges for defrauding campaign donors, and Stephen has incredible news about a new Sasquatch sighting.

I have my doubts that Scalise will be elected on the first ballot, or even any ballot today. So do the writers for The Late Show, which is one of the reasons they created Now You Can Bet on the House Speaker Race for last night's cold open. The other is that it's funny.



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If I were betting, I'd put my money on Hakeem Jeffries to have the most votes on the first ballot, although he's not going to be Speaker - this time.

Stephen name-checked Jimmy Kimmel, who I will get to later, but I'm sharing Santos Charged with More Crimes, Mace Mocked for Scarlet Letter Shirt: A Closer Look from Seth Meyers, who reversed the order of stories, first.

Seth takes a closer look at Republicans choosing Congressman Steve Scalise as nominee for Speaker of the House and whether or not he actually has enough votes to become Speaker.

I haven't blogged about George Santos since May, when I posted George Santos evades expulsion, for now and Trump found liable for sexual abuse and defamation and Santos reported criminally charged. I concluded the latter by whining "It's unfortunate that the writers strike has canceled the late-night talk shows. The jokes about these two stories would have been priceless." The shows are back and the jokes are indeed priceless, although Santos makes them easy to write.

Jimmy Kimmel had more to say about these stories in Congressman George Santos Dodges Reporters After Being Charged with CONSPIRACY, FRAUD & MORE.

Republicans took a fake break from fake-impeaching Joe Biden to nominate Steve Scalise of Louisiana to be their next Speaker, the first U.S. state to allow sales of medical marijuana at regular pharmacies will be Georgia, Google announced that effective immediately entering a password will no longer be their default way to sign in, crazy things are happening in Florida and Michigan, Jimmy has been washing his jeans the wrong way, Sarah Huckabee Sanders has been accused of spending more than $19,000 on a lectern and cooking the books to cover it up, and we track down soon to be former Congressman George Santos (Nelson Franklin) to talk about him being indicted on charges of conspiracy, wire fraud and falsifying records.

Once again, my prediction that, as long as George Santos remains in the news, he will be an inspiration for comedy continues to come true.

Finally, the joke Kimmel told about Scalise learning the wrong lesson from being shot is the one that always comes to mind when I think about him. I gave up on Scalise ever coming around on guns after that. He's a lost cause, pun intended.