Randy Rainbow asks 'HOW WILL YOU VOTE?' for Flashback Friday

Happy Flashback Friday! It's finally time to start my retrospectives of the top posts of the 13th year of Crazy Eddie's Motie News with the subject of the top entry actually posted during the blogging year just ended, Randy Rainbow.* Since this is a Flashback Friday, Randy is not putting out new videos while he's on tour, and the major party presidential nominees will almost certainly be the same as four years ago, I'm celebrating today with a video that turns out to be just as timely now as it was then, Randy asking HOW WILL YOU VOTE? - A Randy Rainbow Song Parody.


I know who I'm voting for in November. Do you?

Follow over the jump for the top posts featuring Randy Rainbow during the 13th year of this blog.

George Santos sues Jimmy Kimmel and Trump sells sneakers

I know I wrote "George Santos — that's a name I was hoping never to write about again," but the man managed to make himself relevant again as George Santos Sues Jimmy Kimmel for Fraud, Trump Hit with Bigly Fine & He Drops New Sneakers.

Jimmy got sued by former Congressman George Santos for fraud after we ordered some of his Cameo videos, Donald Trump was ordered to pay $355 million dollars by a judge in New York, supporters have started GoFundMe pages to help pay the penalty off, Donny made an appearance at Sneaker Con in Philadelphia to sell “The Never Surrender High-Top Sneaker,” and all of the American Presidents were ranked by political science experts and Presidential historians.

The hypocrisy of Santos suing someone for fraud just confirms what I first wrote a dozen years ago, Projection is the Right's favorite defense mechanism, although I think that's the least of Santos's psychological issues. I mean, it takes one to know one. Also, he's suing Disney, which has some of the sharpest lawyers in Hollywood. I'm sure they vetted what Kimmel was doing with Santos's Cameo videos and said it was O.K. It's even more hilarious that Santos sued Disney for copyright violation. I'll let TechDirt comment on this.

Over the weekend, Santos actually sued Kimmel, along with ABC/Disney, claiming copyright infringement. Because, I’m sure, Disney doesn’t employ any copyright lawyers who will eat Santos and his lawyer for lunch and spit out the remains into bowls made out of Mickey Mouse.

The lawsuit is not good. The crux is that Kimmel (1) misrepresented himself and (2) purchased videos under a “personal” license instead of a “commercial” one, and therefore this is both fraud and copyright infringement.

It is likely neither.

On the copyright side, Kimmel has a strong fair use claim. He used them for commentary and criticism without harming the market for Santos’ Cameos (in fact, they likely increased it). The fraud part is just nonsense. Santos didn’t lose money out of this, he made money.

Bingo. The only good thing this does for Santos is keep his name in the public eye. Otherwise, he should look up Streisand effect for how this will backfire on him. He runs a good risk of paying Kimmel's, ABC's, and Disney's legal fees.

Speaking of frauds, Kimmel also made light of Donald Trump's latest legal troubles and attempts to raise money off of them. Trump saying that "it's a very sad day for...the country" reminds me that he has long had a very bad case of "L'État, c'est moi." As far as he's concerned, he is the country. He's also the worst president, something I wish I had written for Presidents Day. Oh, well, better late than never.

Desi Lydic had more to say in Trump Debuts New Cologne and Sneakers & Nikki Haley Won't Drop Out on The Daily Show last night.

Desi Lydic dives into Nikki Haley's struggle to remind people she's still running for President, Trump's ludicrous comparisons to Alexei Navalny, and his latest grifts, which include a shoe line and fragrances. Plus, Josh Johnson chats with some sneakerheads to see if Trump's new sneakers pass the eye test.

Nikki Haley is staying in for the same reasons Liz Cheney is opposing Trump: "As I wrote in July 2022, 'In Liz Cheney's case, she'd like her pre-2015 Republican Party back. I doubt she'll get it any time soon, so she'll settle for damaging TFG instead. I wish her luck.' She's certainly doing her best." Too bad her best won't be good enough to win the nomination.

As for the sneakers and cologne, the former is a crime against fashion, even if it's not prosecutable in a court of law, and both Kimmel and Lydic think the bottle for the latter looks like a sex toy. *Snork*

By the way, this Sunday's episode of Last Week Tonight should be available tomorrow. Stay tuned for that.

A closer look at Suozzi winning Santos's former seat and Mayorkas impeachment

Yesterday, I asked "Comedy, anyone?" No one responded, but the answer is still yes. Watch Trump and GOP Suffer Major Defeat as Democrats Win Back George Santos Seat: A Closer Look.

Seth takes a closer look at the Republican majority in the House shrinking after Democrats win back George Santos' seat while Republicans plow ahead with a pointless impeachment of the homeland security secretary.

I know, I wrote "George Santos — that's a name I was hoping never to write about again," but I'm happy to make an exception for a Democrat replacing him in Congress. Welcome back, Representative Suozzi!

As for last week's failed impeachment vote, the best I can say is "if at first you don't succeed, try, try again." There was definitely a time constraint on the vote. If they had waited even a few days longer, Suozzi would have been sworn in and the vote would have failed again and probably permanently. It will still fail in the Senate, where I'm sure that the upper chamber will not convict. Seth discussed this and more with his first guest, Jake Tapper on Alejandro Mayorkas' Impeachment and United States of Scandal.

Jake Tapper talks about this Congress being the least productive Congress since the Great Depression, calls out an issue he had with the New York Times News Quiz and discusses his show United States of Scandal.

The reason for Alejandro Mayorkas' impeachment is simple; Donald Trump wants revenge for his two impeachments and he demanded someone in Joe Biden's Administration get impeached. He'd prefer Biden himself, but there is no evidence that he did anything impeachable, so Mayorkas it is.

It's time for me to get to work, so I'm ending this here. Stay tuned for a more involved post tomorrow.

Closer looks at Trump and Biden winning in New Hampshire from Meyers, Colbert, and Kimmel

After looking at the Razzies' bad math, it's time for me to return to the New Hampshire Primary through comedy, of course. I begin with Seth Meyers' Even Fox News Admits New Hampshire Result Was Bad for Trump, Good for Biden: A Closer Look.

Seth takes a closer look at Donald Trump threatening Nikki Haley in an angry speech after an underwhelming New Hampshire result where even Fox News was forced to admit that a sizable portion of Republicans might not support Trump in November.

Listening to Marjorie Taylor Greene and Donald Trump reminds me that there's one thing I dislike more than a sore loser and that's a sore winner and both of them are sore winners.

Stephen Colbert covered New Hampshire and more in Trump Is Big Mad At Nikki Haley | White House Pharmacy Scandal | Many Loose Bolts Found On Planes.

The former president lashed out at Nikki Haley for acting like she won the New Hampshire primary, a new report alleges rampant abuse of prescription drugs by staffers in the Trump White House, and Alaska Airlines is finding an alarming number of loose bolts on its planes.

Stephen is right; Trump was being catty about Nikki Haley's dress while hardly being in a position to complain. Also, I'm glad Stephen mentioned Vermin Supreme, a perpetual candidate in New Hampshire and always good for a laugh.

After making jokes about Snoop Dogg, Jimmy Kimmel talked about MAGA Nuts Rally Around Trump After NH Win, Capitol Rioters Arrested & Trouble Brewing in Dildo.

Donald Trump beat Nikki Haley by double digits in New Hampshire last night and she is still aiming to debate him, it was party night in MAGA land as Kellyanne Conway, Marjorie Taylor Greene and George Santos came out in support of Donny, more than a thousand people have been arrested in connection with the Insurrection and the good folks who were rioting are complaining now that it’s affecting their travel plans, Justin Trudeau seems to be losing sleep over Trump possibly being president again, and Jimmy releases an attack ad against a guy named Todd Cole who wants to take his Mayor of Dildo title.

George Santos — that's a name I was hoping never to write about again.

I'm closing the circle by returning to Seth, whose first guest was Alex Wagner Breaks Down the Results of the New Hampshire Primary for Trump and Haley.

Alex Wagner discusses doing the live coverage for the New Hampshire primary and whether she thinks Nikki Haley has the votes to eventually surpass Donald Trump.

If I were in Alex's position, I'd miss the horserace, too. At least she'll get it during the general election.

That's it for the reactions to the New Hampshire Primary. Stay tuned for the Doomsday Clock.

Stephen Colbert returns after his illness with Liz Cheney

I opened Meyers, Kimmel, and 'The Daily Show' take closer looks at Santos being expelled with a program note and well wishes.

I closed 'Bankrupt - Ruby Tuesday' by Bright Sun Films, a tale of the Retail Apocalypse by telling my readers "Stay tuned for comedy tomorrow, when I expect 'Stephen Colbert, Seth Meyers, and especially Jimmy Kimmel will run a victory lap as they dunk on his departure while mourning the loss of a great subject for comedy.'" I got two-thirds of my wish, as both Meyers and Kimmel featured George Santos in their sketches and monologues, while Colbert is at home recovering from a ruptured appendix. Get well soon, Stephen! Your fans miss you!

Stephen returned Monday night. Yay! Welcome back! Watch Monday's monologue, If Trump Gets Unlimited Power He Won’t Be Giving It Up | George Santos Cashes In On Cameo.

The former president doubled down on his assertion that he would only be a dictator on day one if elected again, and former Congressman George Santos already has a lucrative new career.

Hearing Stephen quote others calling Trump "Julius Caesar" and "Orange Jesus" reminds me that John Michael Greer the Archdruid has been calling him "Orange Julius" since at least 2017, if not earlier. I rather like that and if my wife hadn't already likened him to The Penguin running for Mayor of Gotham City, I'd use it as his label. Instead, I want both Greer and his nickname for the 45th President to become better known among the American Left. If he becomes more widely disliked, so be it.

Stephen returned with The Story of Stephen Colbert’s Ruptured Appendix.

Stephen shares the frightening details of his emergency surgery for appendicitis, and thanks everyone for their support during his recovery.

Evie literally made the right call to get Stephen to the hospital. Thank you, Evie!

Follow over the jump for Stephen interviewing Liz Cheney and a bonus cold open.

Meyers, Kimmel, and 'The Daily Show' take closer looks at Santos being expelled

I closed 'Bankrupt - Ruby Tuesday' by Bright Sun Films, a tale of the Retail Apocalypse by telling my readers "Stay tuned for comedy tomorrow, when I expect 'Stephen Colbert, Seth Meyers, and especially Jimmy Kimmel will run a victory lap as they dunk on his departure while mourning the loss of a great subject for comedy.'" I got two-thirds of my wish, as both Meyers and Kimmel featured George Santos in their sketches and monologues, while Colbert is at home recovering from a ruptured appendix. Get well soon, Stephen! Your fans miss you!

Seth Meyers kicks off the farewells with Trump Says He'll "Redo" 2020 Election, George Santos Flees Capitol in Shame: A Closer Look.

Seth takes a closer look at GOP front-runner and four-time indictee Donald Trump claiming in an unhinged and incoherent rant that he will somehow "redo" the 2020 election and would win in a landslide if Jesus was the scorekeeper.

That made for an interesting comparison and contrast between Trump and Santos. Based on indictments, The Former Guy is the bigger criminal, but Santos is the one whose peers punished him. Even so, I have confidence that "the wheels of justice are grinding slowly in this case, but I expect they will indeed grind exceedingly fine" regarding TFG.

It took longer for Kimmel to say his good-bye to Santos in George Santos Kicked Out of Congress, Trump Ate “Too Much” After Jan 6th & a Very MAGA Christmas, saving his farewell until the finale of his monologue.

We are four nights into The Elf on the Shelf and we are providing a service to all the Moms and Dads out there who are doing it, Taylor Swift was in Green Bay for Sunday Night Football between Green Bay and Kansas City, Donald Trump was up late last night typing out a rebuttal to a story in Liz Cheney’s new book, he was in Cedar Rapids on Saturday floating out what might be his most nonsensical election notion yet, he has a lot of stuff for sale on his website in anticipation of Christmas, and George Santos was officially expelled from Congress.

That was a fitting send-off for Santos. Good riddance!

I close with The Daily Show's Congress Votes Santos Out & DeSantis & Newsom Throw Down in place of Colbert.

Charlamagne Tha God tackles Congress voting George Santos out and Felicity Huffman discussing her college admissions scandal. Plus, Ronny Chieng, Desi Lydic, and Michael Kosta weigh in on Gavin Newsom and Ron DeSantis's fiery debate.

I think that Charlamagne Tha God is onto something when he said that Santos's sexual orientation played an unspoken role in his expulsion, at least among Republicans. The Democrats didn't care about that; being a scandalous accused crook was enough.

Finally, I'm glad someone paid attention to the Fox News debate between Ron DeSantis and Gavin Newsom. Newsom attacked DeSantis’ awful record on COVID, which I reinforced in a Twitter thread.

Florida had most of its COVID-19 deaths after vaccines became available.2https://t.co/jExI2Qkwdb pic.twitter.com/J1jkJlTblD

— Crazy Eddie's Motie News (@pinkusensei) December 1, 2023

That first tweet is my most viewed and liked so far this month. Here's to hoping it convinced some people.

'SNL' expels George Santos in its cold open

I made a prediction at the end of U.S. House expels George Santos: "I anticipate Bowen Yang will make one last impersonation of him on Saturday Night Live." That came true in George Santos Expelled Cold Open - SNL.

George Santos (Bowen Yang) holds a press conference after being expelled from Congress.

Called it! Also, is it just me, or is the audience rowdier than usual? Not that it's a bad thing, as it makes the jokes even funnier, but it sure makes this episode stand out.

Santos continued to be the subject of comedy in Weekend Update: George Santos Expelled From Congress, Elon Musk Meets with Netanyahu - SNL.

Weekend Update anchors Colin Jost and Michael Che tackle the week’s biggest news, like George Santos being the sixth member of Congress to be expelled, a BLM co-founder coming out in support of Trump and Melania Trump attending Rosalynn Carter’s funeral.

While I covered Henry Kissinger's death, I neglected the passings of Rosalynn Carter and Sandra Day O'Connor here, although I did share iCivics tribute to O'Connor Honoring the Life and Legacy of Our Founder at the Coffee Party/Citizen Connect Facebook page, so I didn't completely ignore it. I'm glad SNL mentioned both famous women. They deserve at least that much.

Weekend Update shifted gears from politics to public health with Weekend Update: Old Fashioned Cigarette on Banning Vapes.

An Old Fashioned Cigarette (Michael Longfellow) stops by Weekend Update to discuss Australia's move to ban nicotine vapes.

I'm not on the cigarette's side, as I've posted Quitting smoking in the New Year ten years ago, cigarettes as a fire hazard and source of indoor air pollution in Chemical and fire hazards in furniture nine years ago, and cigarette butts as litter in Recycling cigarette butts: Student Sustainability Video Festival 66 six years ago. On the other hand, I've only mentioned vaping devices as e-cigarettes twice, first as one of the stories in Health news from campuses on the campaign trail and again in E-Cigs: A 21st Century health issue, both ten years ago. That doesn't mean I like vaping all that much either. As I wrote in a comment on the last entry, "I don't like smoking and think this is still a way to get people addicted to nicotine." I haven't changed my mind in the decade since.

Follow over the jump for the rest of Weekend Update, the monologue, and two other clips I enjoyed.

U.S. House expels George Santos

I concluded Video tributes to George Zingali for his birthday on World AIDS Day by telegraphing today's topic.

Maybe the House will finally expel George Santos. We should be so lucky, although the talk show hosts will miss him.

We were so lucky.

Watch PBS NewsHour report Santos expelled from House in wake of his many lies and scandals.

For the first time in more than two decades, Congress has expelled one of its own. Rep. George Santos is out of a job in the wake of his many lies and scandals. Congressional correspondent Lisa Desjardins reports on the historic development.

That was the serious report analyzing the reasons for the expulsion, only the sixth in House history and the only one since the Civil War in which a conviction didn't come first (the three expulsions during the Civil War were of Representatives who took up arms for the Confederacy). Now for a more sensationalistic report from Inside Edition, George Santos Expelled From Congress, which shows the reactions to the expulsion.

Reporters mobbed George Santos as he was kicked out of Congress. He stormed out even before the vote to expel him was officially confirmed. The vote tally was decisive with Democrats and Republicans coming together to banish the congressman. He shook hands with a few representatives before walking out. Santos, who became a national figure of mockery for his endless lies, had to vacate his office immediately.

I'm outsourcing my reaction to Nelson Muntz.


With that expression of schadenfreude out of the way, I have to admit I got this wrong back in May and that I'm glad to be wrong.

Kevin "Pickled Tongue" McCarthy and Elise Stefanik aren't going to ask for Santos to resign. They care about his vote more than the dignity and integrity of the House of Representatives. We're stuck with Santos until he either loses re-election or resigns upon conviction (this includes a plea deal, which wouldn't surprise me in the least). Sigh.

Being expelled wasn't among the outcomes I foresaw and this vote shows I was right by not including it. It's not happening.

I would still have written that after the second expulsion attempt failed, but once George Santos declared he was not running for re-election after the Ethics Committee report, the situation changed enough that it was happening and did happen. MSNBC discussed some of the reasons that the political environment transformed to make expulsion successful in ‘To hell with this place:’ George Santos kicked out of Congress.

Indicted Republican George Santos was expelled from Congress on Friday, thus ending “one of the truly strangest chapters in the 234 year history of the U.S. House of Representatives." Rep. Dan Goldman and Mark Chiusano join to discuss.

Unlike McCarthy, Mike Johnson no longer needed Santos's vote for Speaker, although he voted no on expelling him. The rank-and-file GOP members of Congress, to say nothing of the Democrats, decided they had enough of Santos, so good riddance. The third time was a charm.

I expect to blog once or twice more about Santos being removed from Congress, once tomorrow when I anticipate Bowen Yang will make one last impersonation of him on Saturday Night Live and again on Tuesday when Stephen Colbert, Seth Meyers, and especially Jimmy Kimmel will run a victory lap as they dunk on his departure while mourning the loss of a great subject for comedy. Stay tuned.

People want pandas, so 'SNL' opens with a panda at Biden's press conference

Last night's episode of Saturday Night Live began by laughing at the priorities of the media and its consumers in Biden Panda Cold Open.

President Joe Biden (Mikey Day) holds a press conference after meeting with Chinese President Xi Jinping.

Watching the reporters being more interested in Bowen Yang's panda then Mikey Day's Biden using that interest to deflect from inconvenient questions reminds me of what my friend Nebris says is one of my great insights.

"America is quite clear about its screwed up priorities­. My experience has convinced me that the surest way to get Americans to act is to mess with their entertainm­ent" and "Americans want their entertainment, and will do just about anything to keep it going."

China taking its pandas back messed with a lot of Americans' entertainment and they want new pandas. The media are happy to cater to this desire, which draws clicks and views. Should the Chinese lend pandas back to U.S. zoos, it will make both China, if not Xi, and Biden more popular in the U.S. That's a win-win. Now to see if it actually happens.

Weekend Update: Biden Calls Chinese President a Dictator, Trump Jr. Testifies in Fraud Trial mentioned one of the reasons that deal might not happen.

Weekend Update anchors Colin Jost and Michael Che tackle the week's biggest news, like Republican Senator Markwayne Mullin challenging the Teamsters union president to a fistfight.

I agree with Biden; Xi's a dictator. Just the same, that's not helpful in getting what we want out of the U.S.-China relationship.

I haven't been at all diligent about coming up with drinks and memes for Republican candidates, let alone writing farewell posts when they drop out, so I'm relieved that Tim Scott dropped out. It saved me the trouble. Bye!

Colin Jost rephrased my recycled comment.

My wife used to work for the Teamsters and we live three miles away from the last place Jimmy Hoffa was seen alive, so we know anyone asking to fight that union's president is asking for trouble. I wonder if Senator Mullin has a clue about that.

Based on the way we bragged about it on right-wing televison outlets, I'd say Mullin either doesn't know or doesn't care.

I don't know if Senator Markwayne Mullin has a death wish or not, but I agree with Jost — never mess with the Teamsters!

The next clip returns to the topic of George Santos not running for re-election after ethics report, closer looks from Colbert, Meyers, and Kimmel, Weekend Update: Colin Jost Interviews Rep. George Santos Again - SNL.

Rep. George Santos (Bowen Yang) stops by Weekend Update to discuss the House Ethics Committee's report claiming he used campaign funds for personal spending.

One of my best and easiest predictions was that George Santos will be a great inspiration for comedy as long as he stays in the news. That's continuing to come true.

Follow over the jump for the rest of the highlight's from last night's episode.

George Santos not running for re-election after ethics report, closer looks from Colbert, Meyers, and Kimmel

I found a shinier object than Life Day to blog about today, George Santos. The House Ethics Committee released its report on him, after which he announced that he is not running for re-election. The late-night talk show hosts all made that news the subjects of their monologues, beginning with Stephen Colbert's George Santos Used Donor Funds For Botox & OnlyFans | Our Do-Nothing Congress | Does Biden Trust Xi?

An ethics probe into Rep. George Santos reported that he committed fraud, but he won’t be expelled from Congress. Elsewhere, the GOP-led House is the least productive in a century and President Biden explained his cautious approach to trusting China’s leader.

One of my best and easiest predictions was that Santos will be a great inspiration for comedy as long as he stays in the news. That's continuing to come true.

Seth Meyers covered that story and more in Damning Video Evidence Emerges in Trump Trial, Shocking Santos Report Released: A Closer Look.

Seth takes a closer look at the House Ethics Committee releasing a devastating report about alleged lawbreaking by Republican Rep. George Santos and damning new evidence coming out in the Georgia criminal case against Trump.

LOL, "tiddlywinks." And Trump's supporters think Biden sounds old.

I close with Jimmy Kimmel's George Santos Hit with Scathing Ethics Report & Trump Media Group DEMANDS an Apology from Jimmy.

Seth takes a closer look at the House Ethics Committee releasing a devastating report about alleged lawbreaking by Republican Rep. George Santos and damning new evidence coming out in the Georgia criminal case against Trump.

"Where we're going, we don't need ethics." Yeah, George, keep telling yourself that.

Meyers, Colbert, and Kimmel take more closer looks at Don Jr. and Eric testifying and George Santos surviving another expulsion vote

I'm returning to the comedy well today because Don Jr. testified another day, leading to Seth Meyers describing Trump "Livid" About NY Fraud Trial as Don Jr. Gets Grilled by Prosecutors: A Closer Look.

Seth takes a closer look at Donald Trump Jr. testifying in the fraud trial against his family's business that he had virtually nothing to do with his own company's financial documents, despite personally signing them.

As I wrote yesterday, "Pass the popcorn."

I did write that I might return with more Colbert today, but not Adam Kinzinger, although he's still on my to-do list.* Instead, I'm embedding last night's monologue, World’s Longest Zucchini | Trump Kids Take the Stand | George Santos Survives Expulsion Attempt.

Stephen examines an extra-long Canadian zucchini, looks at courtroom sketches of Donald Trump’s children testifying at their father's civil trial, and thanks Congress for voting not to expel Republican Rep. George Santos.

Before I address the rest of the monologue, I'm sharing Tim Curry - The Zucchini Song as my response.


Saturday Night Live should post that clip on the show's YouTube channel. It deserves a better quality upload and would be even more hilarious.

Don Jr. may or may not have inherited his father's business sense or lack thereof, but he certainly inherited his vanity. In all my 64 years, I don't recall anyone being so concerned about how his courtroom sketches looked.

Jimmy Kimmel examined both the Trump sons testifying and George Santos surviving a vote to expel him in Trump’s Dumb Sons Testify in Fraud Trial & George Santos Lives to Scam Another Day.

It was hometown date night on “The Golden Bachelor,” the Texas Rangers beat the Arizona Diamondbacks last night to bring home their first ever World Series and Ted Cruz chimed in, Trump’s most embarrassing sons took the stand in the $250 million fraud case against their family business, Donny is planning to start another University called “The American Academy,” Congressman George Santos will live to scam another day after the House rejected a resolution to expel him from Congress, and there is a bombshell announcement from the American Ornithological Society in regards to naming birds.

Both Colbert and Kimmel have acknowledged what I've been writing about George Santos since January; he will be a great inspiration for comedy as long as he stays in the news. That's been one of my best and easiest predictions.

All I have to say about renaming North American bird species right now is that Kimmel shouldn't be giving Fox News any ideas. They have enough bad ones already.

I close with last night's cold open for The Late Show with Stephen Colbert, The Trump Kids in America.

Eric, Donald Jr., and Ivanka Trump wrote a special song dedicated to the judges handling their father's civil fraud trial.

More popcorn, please.

*So is Pete Buttigieg, who was on last night. Maybe tomorrow, although I have both the end of Daylight Saving Time and the Sunday entertainment feature already on my agenda. Stay tuned to see what I blog about.

'SNL' satirizes Jim Jordan's losing bid for Speaker

Saturday Night Live began last night by satirizing Jim Jordan's 'Groundhog Day' of losing votes in Jim Jordan Cold Open - SNL.

Jim Jordan (Mikey Day) hears from George Santos (Bowen Yang), Lauren Boebert (Chloe Fineman) and Donald Trump (James Austin Johnson) after losing the House Speaker vote again.

Yay, a good political skit. That's what I've been waiting for since April 8th, when James Austin Johnson's 'Trump' hijacked the Last Supper on 'SNL' for Easter. Pete Davidson's cold open last week was moving and the right thing to do, but it wasn't it.

Jordan's woes continued to be the topic in the opening segment of Weekend Update: Jim Jordan Dropped as Speaker Nominee, Trump Gag Order - SNL.

Weekend Update anchors Colin Jost and Michael Che tackle the week's biggest news, like Netflix planning to open brick and mortar stores and Ron DeSantis spending $1.5 million on private jets.

As I wrote last week, "Weekend Update...opened with jokes about the reactions to the crisis, not the conflict itself. Those are worth ridiculing." This includes President Biden telling Israel's adveraries "don't." I just hope it's more effective than telling his dogs not to bite Secret Service agents.

Colin Jost and Michael Che also examined Trump's gag order. I admit to being pleased that the former guy found it frustrating. As far as I'm concerned, that's the point.

I haven't mentioned Ron DeSantis this month, so good for SNL bringing him up. He deserves this kind of attention. As for Netflix planning on opening brick-and-mortar stores, I found that a surprising combination of the Retail Apocalypse and entertainment, to say nothing of it being a questionable business decision. That reminds me that I've embedded videos mentioning Blockbuster Video in Ten of the companies that went out of business this decade and 9,300+ stores closed this year, two tales of the Retail Apocalypse and WatchMojo's 'Top 20 Stores That Don't Exist Anymore' for Throwback Thursday, tales of the Retail Apocalypse, I've never written a post highlighting the company's rise and fall by itself. I'll keep that in mind.

Follow over the jump for the rest of last night's highlights.

Closer looks at Steve Scalise running for Speaker and George Santos indicted again from Colbert, Meyers, and Kimmel

I'm returning to the fallout from Kevin "Pickled Tongue" McCarthy being ousted as Speaker of the House, which I haven't covered since Friday's Colbert, Meyers, and Kimmel turn their attention to Matt Gaetz. The House needed a break and so did I. I begin with Stephen Colbert's monologue, Scalise Nabs House Speaker Nom | George Santos Scammed His Own Donors | Bigfoot Found!

Rep. Steve Scalise is the GOP’s nominee for Speaker of the House, Rep. George Santos faces new federal charges for defrauding campaign donors, and Stephen has incredible news about a new Sasquatch sighting.

I have my doubts that Scalise will be elected on the first ballot, or even any ballot today. So do the writers for The Late Show, which is one of the reasons they created Now You Can Bet on the House Speaker Race for last night's cold open. The other is that it's funny.



Get in on the action at DraftKandidates!
If I were betting, I'd put my money on Hakeem Jeffries to have the most votes on the first ballot, although he's not going to be Speaker - this time.

Stephen name-checked Jimmy Kimmel, who I will get to later, but I'm sharing Santos Charged with More Crimes, Mace Mocked for Scarlet Letter Shirt: A Closer Look from Seth Meyers, who reversed the order of stories, first.

Seth takes a closer look at Republicans choosing Congressman Steve Scalise as nominee for Speaker of the House and whether or not he actually has enough votes to become Speaker.

I haven't blogged about George Santos since May, when I posted George Santos evades expulsion, for now and Trump found liable for sexual abuse and defamation and Santos reported criminally charged. I concluded the latter by whining "It's unfortunate that the writers strike has canceled the late-night talk shows. The jokes about these two stories would have been priceless." The shows are back and the jokes are indeed priceless, although Santos makes them easy to write.

Jimmy Kimmel had more to say about these stories in Congressman George Santos Dodges Reporters After Being Charged with CONSPIRACY, FRAUD & MORE.

Republicans took a fake break from fake-impeaching Joe Biden to nominate Steve Scalise of Louisiana to be their next Speaker, the first U.S. state to allow sales of medical marijuana at regular pharmacies will be Georgia, Google announced that effective immediately entering a password will no longer be their default way to sign in, crazy things are happening in Florida and Michigan, Jimmy has been washing his jeans the wrong way, Sarah Huckabee Sanders has been accused of spending more than $19,000 on a lectern and cooking the books to cover it up, and we track down soon to be former Congressman George Santos (Nelson Franklin) to talk about him being indicted on charges of conspiracy, wire fraud and falsifying records.

Once again, my prediction that, as long as George Santos remains in the news, he will be an inspiration for comedy continues to come true.

Finally, the joke Kimmel told about Scalise learning the wrong lesson from being shot is the one that always comes to mind when I think about him. I gave up on Scalise ever coming around on guns after that. He's a lost cause, pun intended.

George Santos evades expulsion, for now

The next step in George Santos being criminally charged almost happened yesterday, as MSNBC reported House Republicans stall effort to expel George Santos from Congress.

Instead of an up-or-down vote on whether to expel George Santos, Republicans voted along party lines to kick the issue over to the House Ethics Committee—which is already investigating Santos. Congresswoman Becca Balint joins Chris Hayes to discuss.

I'm repeating what I wrote earlier this month.

Kevin "Pickled Tongue" McCarthy and Elise Stefanik aren't going to ask for Santos to resign. They care about his vote more than the dignity and integrity of the House of Representatives. We're stuck with Santos until he either loses re-election or resigns upon conviction (this includes a plea deal, which wouldn't surprise me in the least). Sigh.

Being expelled wasn't among the outcomes I foresaw and this vote shows I was right by not including it. It's not happening.

As for the second Republican Representative Chris Hayes asked Becca Balint about, Paul Gosar, I'm surprised I haven't mentioned him on this blog before. It's about time I did and I should write more about him. Stay tuned.

I close by repeating Representative Balint's question, what has happened to this nation?

Trump found liable for sexual abuse and defamation and Santos reported criminally charged

Stephanie Ruhle hosted a panel about yesterday's legal news on MSNBC in Breaking down Trump sexual abuse verdict, George Santos federal charges.

The jury in E. Jean Carroll’s civil suit against the former president rejected the rape allegation. Meanwhile, Republican Congressman George Santos has reportedly been charged with federal offenses. Tim O’Brien, Cynthia Alksne and Charles Coleman break down the day’s legal bombshells.

Allow me this rant about the Republicans as "the party of law and order" — that's branding for being the party of using the law to maintain the social order. If the law doesn't maintain the social order, the party's not for it. It's right up there with "pro-life" for anti-abortion, "fiscal responsibility" for not spending money and people and causes the party disapproves of, regardless of whether it makes economic sense, and "pro-family" for discriminating against people who don't fit in the Twentieth Century nuclear family — all branding for gaining power to enforce the social order. Don't believe those slogans as anything else. Once that's clear, all the lawlessness by GOP members and politicians makes perfect sense.

PBS NewsHour went into more detail about yesterday's verdict in Breaking down the verdict as jury finds Trump liable for sexual assault and defamation, where it was the top story as well.

A New York jury found former President Trump liable for sexually abusing columnist E. Jean Carroll in the mid-90s and later defaming her. The nine jurors deliberated for a few hours before delivering their verdict and awarding Carroll $5 million. Trump called the verdict "a disgrace" and his lawyers said they will appeal. Amna Nawaz discussed the case with Andrea Bernstein and Laura Beth Nielsen.

Vox didn't list this case among The Trump investigations you should actually care about, but those were about criminal cases, this is a civil suit, but it turned out to be the first decided against Donald Trump since that video. It won't send him to jail — not that I think that will happen; as I wrote when TFG was indicted, "I expect he'll be sentenced to house arrest in Trump Tower with the Secret Service as his guards, at least for this set of crimes. He might get a more severe punishment if he's indicted and convicted for crimes in Georgia and Washington, D.C." — but it's a finding that he engaged in criminal behavior, even if he's not convicted of criminal charges. The judgment will hang over the rest of his re-election campaign. Too bad the lawlessness of the GOP primary voters is likely to allow him to be re-nominated.

On the other hand, George Santos is facing criminal charges, as MSNBC reported George Santos criminally charged by DOJ, calls for McCarthy to remove him from Congress on All In with Chris Hayes last night.

Congressman Dan Goldman (D-NY): “For George Santos to have a vote that counts as much as my vote is a travesty and I think that hopefully the Speaker will come around and recognize that that’s the right thing to do.”

Goldman's right. Kevin "Pickled Tongue" McCarthy and Elise Stefanik aren't going to ask for Santos to resign. They care about his vote more than the dignity and integrity of the House of Representatives. We're stuck with Santos until he either loses re-election or resigns upon conviction (this includes a plea deal, which wouldn't surprise me in the least). Sigh.

It's unfortunate that the writers strike has canceled the late-night talk shows. The jokes about these two stories would have been priceless.

Fox and Dominion settle — silly to serious reactions from Colbert, CNN, and MSNBC

The Fox News-Dominion lawsuit ended with a settlement yesterday. I found that slightly disappointing, despite the huge sum Fox News agreed to pay Dominion. I'm not alone. Listen to the studio audience when Stephen Colbert told them the news in Fox Settles Suit, Begins Damage Control | DeSantis Attacks Disney Again | George Santos Needs Cash.*

After settling with Dominion for $787.5 million, Fox News will not have to acknowledge its election lies on the air. Elsewhere, Florida’s governor won’t stop attacking his state’s biggest employer, and New York congressman George Santos launched fundraising efforts for his re-election campaign.

They groaned. Both Stephen and his audience wanted a trial and they didn't get it. They wanted Fox to be humiliated publicly and to be entertained while watching it and now they're not going to get it. They're not alone. Watch and listen to CNN's panel this morning in CNN anchor worked at Fox for 16 years. Hear why she thinks Fox got out of Dominion lawsuit easy.

CNN anchor Alisyn Camerota, who previously worked at Fox News for 16 years, weighs in on the settlement between Fox News and Dominion Voting Systems, explaining why she thinks Fox received the "best outcome" it could have hoped for.

This is probably the best outcome both companies could have achieved — Dominion gets the money while Fox doesn't have to publicly retract its statements on air — but not a good result for truth or democracy. Unfortunately, neither truth nor democracy are parties to the suit.

The panelists on MSNBC's "Morning Joe" had even more to say about the settlement in Danny Cevallos: The Dominion, Fox case was always going to settle.

Fox News and Dominion Voting Systems reached a $787.5 million settlement agreement Tuesday afternoon, the parties announced, narrowly heading off a trial shortly after the jury was sworn in. The Morning Joe panel discusses.

I've been in a defamation suit before and found that Cevallos is right the hard way; defamation claims are almost impossible to prove, trials are best avoided, and many potential defendants are essentially judgment-proof. So while I'm a bit disappointed that the case settled, I'm not surprised. Also, this is only the first legal action to reach a resolution; there are more to come, so Fox will likely pay out a lot more money, even if it never ends up making a retraction on air.

I conclude with Joe on the Dominion, Fox lawsuit: This is an American tragedy.

Fox News and Dominion Voting Systems reached a $787.5 million settlement agreement Tuesday afternoon. The Morning Joe panel discusses the outcome.

Like the CNN panel, Scarborough connected the suit to both the Big Lie and to January 6th. Fox News' lies not only harmed democracy and the truth, they led the participants in the failed coup attempt to harm themselves. It's almost enough to make me feel sorry for them.

I have a brief retrospective planned for 4/20 on Throwback Thursday tomorrow. Stay tuned.

*I need to follow up on DeSantis's reaction to Disney subverting DeSantis's replacement for the Reedy Creek Improvement District, Disney World's own government; he's making himself look even worse while getting liberals to side with a big corporation. Nice trick, but not the one he's trying to pull. Finally, my prediction that, as long as George Santos remains in the news, he will be an inspiration for comedy continues to come true.

Meyers, Colbert, and Kimmel take closer looks at George Santos

I opened yesterday's Jon Stewart on the problem with George Santos with "I have another example of George Santos living up to my prediction that he'll be a great inspiration for comedy as long as he stays in the news, which might be much longer than he stays in the House." That continues to be true, as Seth Meyers, Stephen Colbert, and Jimmy Kimmel all made Santos, if that's actually his legal name, the subject of segments last night. I begin with GOP in Chaos as George Santos Scandal Gets Crazier, Greene and Boebert Fight: A Closer Look from "Late Night with Seth Meyers."

Seth takes a closer look at the rolling GOP meltdown that began with the party’s humiliating speaker vote, including Lauren Boebert and Marjorie Taylor Greene fighting in a bathroom, serial liar George Santos facing calls to resign and Donald Trump getting ready to rejoin Facebook and Twitter.

Seth may have started out with Kevin "Pickled Tongue" McCarthy, Marjorie Taylor Greene, and Lauren Boebert, but the meat of his routine was Santos. He's proving to be a big soft target for satire.

Speaking of which, Stephen Colbert interviewed "George Santos" (played by Saturn Award nominee Harvey Guillén) in George Santos Joins Stephen Colbert To Clear His Name(s).

After being exposed for telling numerous lies about his identity and resumé, Rep. George Santos joins Stephen Colbert live on The Late Show to truthfully answer the question everyone is asking: who is George Santos? Special thanks to our friend Harvey Guillén!

I'm being a good environmentalist by recycling my reaction from 'SNL' returns after winning an Emmy Award: "It's hard for satire to be more ridiculous than reality these days, but this segment managed to do so."

Jimmy Kimmel also interviewed "George Santos" (this time played by Nelson Franklin) during the final minutes of George Santos FINALLY Answers for His Lies, Trump Points Finger at Biden & MyPillow Mike is Broke!

Joe Biden was in California surveying the damage from the recent floods, Trump lashed out on Truth Social about being treated unfairly in regards to his classified documents, his new goal is to make it seem like the golf mausoleum he lives in is some kind of Fort Knox, Fox News is trying hard to sell that Biden’s docs are worse by connecting it all to Hunter, Donny is looking to get back on Facebook, MyPillow Man Mike Lindell is almost out of stuffing and is crying poor, Jimmy extends an invite to our show so long as he does it from the inside of a Dave and Busters claw machine, and since exposed fraud/Congressman George Santos of New York won’t speak with the reporters in Congress, we thought we would go straight to the source and talk to him (Nelson Franklin) personally.

If the real George Santos, as much as any of his public persona is real, won't answer questions, we may as well talk to a fake George Santos. We might actually get answers, some of which might accidentally turn out to be true!

I conclude by returning to Colbert for last night's cold open, which asked Did Lassie Get Revenge On George Santos?



Don’t mess with the dogs!
Ha ha! That would be fitting!

I have a a fun if busy weekend for blogging lined up, with part 2 of Angela Bassett wins Best Supporting Actress at the Golden Globes and Critics' Choice Awards, part 1 of diversity in awards show winners for MLK Day about "Everything Everywhere All at Once," Lunar New Year, and the return of "Saturday Night Live" for both new years planned. Stay tuned.