The Marsh Family sings 'Moronic' about Lake Ontario and the trade war with Canada

I promised "something short I can share to social media" and the Marsh Family promptly obliged by uploading "Moronic" - Marsh Family parody of Alanis Morissette's "Ironic" about Trump's Trade War with Canada.

This song treats the Trump shenanigans in recent days as he has escalated a trade war with Canada and – when faced with defiance and the threat of counter tariffs – indulged in petty statements and pathetic acts such as sanctimoniously renaming Lake Ontario as ‘Lake America’. We have been inundated with requests from Canadian followers for something on this topic (including plenty of suggested lyrics and songs) – but we’ve stuck to our own model and selection, which we nearly always do. We wanted to use an iconic Canadian musician for the parody, and opted for the cutting tongue and clean spiky sound of Alanis Morissette – whose show Danielle loved seeing live in London recently. "Jagged Little Pill" was one of our favourite albums - coming out in 1995 when we first met at uni - and "Ironic" (co-written and produced by Glen Ballard) topped the Canadian chart for six weeks when released, thanks in part to a memorable music video that showcased different characters/versions of her.

Yes, it is moronic, but I expect no better from Donald "Pervert Hoover" Trump, especially on trade.

The Marsh Family deserves an encore, so I'm embedding Canada Responds To Trump’s Tariff Threat from The Late Show with Stephen Colbert.

After President Trump took offense to an advertisement featuring Ronald Reagan, he threatened Canada with major tariffs. Here now is Canada’s official response.

Yes, it's nearly a year old, but it still works. Also, as I wrote in 'The Late Show with Stephen Colbert's final Emmy nominations, "That was fun and I already miss Stephen. My monologue posts are not the same without him."

That's a wrap for today's post and August's blogging. Stay tuned for the first post of September.

Tariffs on brass instruments, really?

I saw a post on Instagram last week about tariffs on brass instruments that I decided to follow up on here. KCCI has the story in Proposed 25% tariff on brass instruments raises concerns for music retailers, students.

WATE 6 On Your Side in Knoxville, Tennessee has more in Proposed 25% tariff on brass instruments could hike costs for school bands.

Brass instruments could soon become more expensive as the U.S. Department of Commerce has proposed a 25% tariff on brass-wind musical instruments, parts, and accessories. Brass-wind instruments are among 14 categories of products being considered for Section 232 tariffs on aluminum, steel, and copper.

I take this story personally, as I'm a brass player, having started off on French horn in middle school, switched to tuba in high school, which I also played in college and as an alumnus, and played baritone and contrabass bugle in drum corps, all brass instruments. Unless one thinks the brass instruments in military bands count, I don't consider brass instruments to be a national security issue. Also, it's not as if there is a lot of domestic production of brass instruments to protect, as WJHL mentions in 25% tariff proposal on brass instruments could spike costs for band students.

The U.S. Department of Commerce proposed a 25% tariff on imported brass-wind instruments, drawing negative feedback from local band programs and instrument shops.

U.S. instrument companies have offshored a lot of their production. Maybe these tariffs will bring some instrument manufacturing back to the U.S., but that will take a while. Tariffs will hurt music students now.

While this is serious business, it definitely seems a bit silly, so I'm closing with Trombones Are a "National Security Threat" Now | 84 Days | Paula Poundstone.

The administration declared brass instruments a national security threat. Paula Poundstone has a simpler idea. Today's thing: call your Representative and demand Trump be impeached. 84 days to November 3rd.

HAHAHAHAHA! But seriously, Congress has impeached Donald "Pervert Hoover" Trump twice. Without convicting and removing him, it won't do any good. There aren't the votes to do any of that right now. It would be better to comment against this proposed tariff by August 27th and work to elect Democrats and independents who would provide majorities to impeach and convict Trump and his Cabinet officers next year.

That's a wrap for today. Stay tuned for World Mosquito Day.

Small Business Saturday 2025 from National Day Calendar and NBC News

Happy Small Business Saturday! I begin today's celebration with Marlo Anderson of National Day Calendar hosting SMALL BUSINESS SATURDAY - Saturday after Thanksgiving.

Small businesses feed our communities. They keep our main streets thriving and employ nearly half of the American workforce. Supporting small businesses means you're supporting your local economy, local business, tax base, schools, and infrastructure. Your holiday shopping will put food on the tables of people you know.

You will be doing your community some good, and you will also be finding quality gifts. Small businesses take pride in their work. They've worked hard for their dream, and it shows in their craftsmanship.

Anderson did a good job of reviewing the history of the holiday and its rationale. I would know; I've been observing Small Business Saturday since 2011, the first year of this blog and the second year of the special day.

For more detail, I turn to NBC News/NBC Select explaining How To Support Small Businesses this Small Business Saturday.

Small Business Saturday a great day to shop small — business owners say 20% of their annual revenue will come from this year's event. However, it's important to shop small businesses all year long. NBC Select reporter Zoe Malin stopped by @NBCNews Now to talk all things supporting small.

Big businesses like At Home, Kohl's, Joann, Claire's, and Target aren't the only ones affected by tariffs; small businesses might be even more affected by them. This makes tariffs a sustainability issue, since I count shopping small and local as a sustainable action.

NBC News had more to say about today on TODAY. Watch this morning's Small Business Saturday 2025: Try These Tips for Shopping Local.

Small Business Saturday is an annual shopping day that encourages consumers to support local businesses on the Saturday after Thanksgiving. NBC’s Brian Cheung joins Saturday TODAY to share tips for shopping local, how to find small businesses and more.

In addition to reinforcing the points about the importance of Small Business Saturday to small businesses, Brian Cheung and the TODAY panel previewed Cyber Monday. I'm glad they did, because I'm not observing it this year. That's because it falls on December 1st, World AIDS Day. Since the Trump Administration canceled funding for World AIDS Day commemorations after 37 years, effectively meaning it won't celebrate the day officially, I'm going to celebrate it here all the more. Priorities.

That's a wrap for both today and the string of holiday posts. Stay tuned for the Sunday entertainment feature to close out September.

'Weathered' explains 'This Is EXACTLY How Much Poorer Climate Change Will Make Every Person on Earth'

I closed Company Man wonders 'Cracker Barrel - The Rise and Fall?' A tale of the Retail Apocalypse and consumer pressure by telling my readers "Stay tuned to see if I write this year's version of Star Trek vs. Star Wars at the 2024 Emmy Awards for Star Trek Day so I can cover Andor's Creative Arts Emmy nominations or post the video from Weathered on PBS Terra that I was originally planning on posting today." I decided to go with This Is EXACTLY How Much Poorer Climate Change Will Make Every Person on Earth.

Climate scientists warn of climate disaster. But economists? Many say the economic hit from global warming will be negligible. But a new study shows the cost could be way worse than we once thought. In this episode, we reveal exactly how much poorer we will be in 2100, break down why previous models got it wrong, what this study means for our future, and the “goldilocks” path to decarbonization.

It looks like the economists didn't heed one of Commoner's Laws, "Everything is connected to everything else." They ignored economic effects outside of the countries they were analyzing that would affect the target countries. On the other hand, the scientists weren't. I'm glad Timothy Neal looked at the effects of global climate change on national economies. As we are finding out about tariffs, trade is important.

This is on top of the usual Commoner's Law lessons about climate change, "Everything must go somewhere (There is no away)" and "There is no free lunch" about the problem and "Nature knows best" for the solutions. That written, there is an optimal, if not ideal path. Too fast a transition would be as bad as the post-Peak-Oil future predicted in The End of Suburbia. Too slow and the planet will pass too many tipping points. To repeat what I wrote in PBS Terra tells 'The Dirty Truth About Our Clean Energy Future', "As I tell my students, sustainability is a balancing act. May we not fall over."

That's a wrap for today's evergreen educational entry. Stay tuned for the Sunday entertainment feature.

CNBC explains 'How China Proved It Can Shut Down Global Auto Production,' a driving update

I promised a driving update for the new car and I'm getting to it over the jump after sharing CNBC explaining How China Proved It Can Shut Down Global Auto Production.

China dominates the world‘s production and processing of rare earth elements, which are used in all kinds of things: sports equipment, national defense, and each of the roughly 16 million cars sold in the US every year. Over the last few years, the Asian country has been tightening access and suddenly restricted exports in early April 2025. The move sent shockwaves through the auto industry which can’t build cars without these minerals. CNBC Dove in to see how we got here, and how the auto industry might find its way out.

China's dominance of rare earth element production and processing is something I mention to my students every semester in both geology and environmental science. I first mentioned it here in 2012, and wrote an entire entry about it in 2019, when I warned China threatens to restrict exports of rare earths.

I point out that the U.S. is 100% dependent on imports of 21 minerals, chief among them rare earths, and that many of the countries that we import them from are not our friends, especially China and Russia. Not only do I tell my students this, but I say that China in particular could cut off exports of rare earths, which would cripple our ability to make many products.

Thanks to Donald "Hoover Cleveland" Trump's tariffs, it looks like the day I've been warning my students about for more than a decade has arrived. Sometimes, I wish I weren't right.

That's the general driving situation. Follow over the jump for my personal driving update.

Company Man asks 'The Decline of Claire's...What Happened?' A tale of the Retail Apocalypse

I had a scientific video planned for today's evergreen educational post, but that was before I saw Company Man asking The Decline of Claire's...What Happened?

The iconic mall-based retailer has filed for bankruptcy. This video explores the history of Claire's while outlining what I believe to be five of the biggest reasons behind its decline.

I anticipated this video in CNBC asks 'Can Claire's Survive Its Second Bankruptcy?' A tale of the Retail Apocalypse and tariffs.

Competition with Shein, Temu, and TikTok Shop and tariffs - the first formed a major reason behind Forever 21 filing for bankruptcy and closing all U.S. stores while the second contributed to Joann and At Home filing for bankruptcy. They may have been the first chains that blamed those factors, but they won't be the last. Of course, private equity played a part in the story, but CNBC didn't identify them as the cause of the debt Claire's couldn't pay. I may have to wait until Company Man or Bright Sun Films cover the chain to confirm that.

Here is Company Man Mike's list.


Number one, leveraged buyout. That's a tactic private equity uses, so good enough for me. That written, private equity looks to be the savior of the chain, at least for now.

Company Man rolled tariffs into economic factors, along with the Great Recession and the pandemic. Those were on top of declining mall traffic (and fewer malls) and competition with Shein and Temu but also Lovisa and Five Below, two chains I haven't mentioned here before. At least Amazon wasn't blamed!

Company Man added one thing that I didn't already know or suspect, brand perception. That was an issue for different reasons with Hooters, so I shouldn't be surprised.

That's a wrap for the Retail Apocalypse today. I might return to Claire's should Bright Sun Films produce a video. In the meantime, stay tuned for the 20th anniversary of Hurricane Katrina.

CNBC asks 'Can Claire’s Survive Its Second Bankruptcy?' A tale of the Retail Apocalypse and tariffs

I promised "an evergreen educational entry" for today, and I suppose a tale of the Retail Apocalypse qualifies, so watch as CNBC asks Can Claire’s Survive Its Second Bankruptcy?

Claire’s has filed for its second bankruptcy in seven years. Despite attempts to modernize, the company has not been able to overcome challenges including stiff competition from players like Shein, Temu, and TikTok Shop and increased costs related to tariffs. Watch the video to learn about the rise and fall of long-time American mall favorite Claire’s.

Competition with Shein, Temu, and TikTok Shop and tariffs — the first formed a major reason behind Forever 21 filing for bankruptcy and closing all U.S. stores while the second contributed to Joann and At Home filing for bankruptcy. They may have been the first chains that blamed those factors, but they won't be the last. Of course, private equity played a part in the story, but CNBC didn't identify them as the cause of the debt Claire's couldn't pay. I may have to wait until Company Man or Bright Sun Films cover the chain to confirm that. Retail Archaeology? Erik examined the first bankruptcy seven years ago. I'll get to that.

As for what the future holds, the following graphic shows that Claire's is in bad company.


I already mentioned Joann and Forever 21. Add in Party City, Rite Aid, Tuesday Morning, Rue21, and Z Gallerie, and the list becomes a who's who of chains that no longer have physical locations in the U.S. or, in the case of Rite Aid, will soon close them. At least David's Bridal and True Religion Apparel still have stores open, but 20% odds are not good.

Now for a video I should have posted seven years ago, Claire's: BANKRUPTCY! | Dead Mall & Retail Documentary | Retail Archaeology.

In this episode we take a look at Claire's, a retailer that operates in 95% of malls in the United States. In March of 2018 Claire's filed for chapter 11 bankruptcy protection.

That was fun, if not all that informative. Still, better late than never.

I expect to see more about Claire's from the usual sources. When I do, I'll post it here. In the meantime, stay tuned for the next installment about Emmy Awards nominees.

At Home files for bankruptcy, a tale of the Retail Apocalypse and tariffs

The next tale of the Retail Apocalypse after Rite Aid filing for bankruptcy again comes from Erik of Retail Archaeology, whose most recent video is At Home: Another Private Equity Bankruptcy.

In this episode of Retail Archaeology we check out At Home, a huge home goods and decor store that is about to file for bankruptcy.

Listening to Erik's history of the company made me think of three factors I've encountered before with troubled stores. First, Garden Ridge, At Home's previous name, filing for bankruptcy in 2004, reminded me of what I wrote most recently about Rite Aid, "Most of the chains succumbing during the Retail Apocalypse were already in trouble..." At Home is one of them. Next, "line go up" in 2020 reflected what happened to Joann and Big Lots!. "Both thrived during the pandemic because people were at home, then suffered once people returned to work." Third, I've often seen private equity as a cause of debt leading to failure, most recently in the case of Weight Watchers. Erik wasted no time pointing that out in the video title.

On the other hand, he was not as convinced about tariffs as a cause other than the final nail in the coffin, which he said as a voice over while showing Halloween decorations. I'm surprised he didn't mention Spirit Halloween as a competitor along with Walmart, Target, and Wayfair.

I've seen Erik criticize a chain's business model before, but never this relentlessly. Also, this is the first time I remember hearing him credit HGTV for a company's success, however fleeting, although I think he's onto something.

Erik thought that At Home might file for bankruptcy the day he uploaded his video. He was only off by one day, as WFMY News 2 in Greensboro, North Carolina uploaded Popular home goods store 'At Home' announces bankruptcy amid tariff strain on June 16, 2025.

At Home's CEO partly blames tariffs for the company's decision to close stores.

At Home may be the first retailer to declare bankruptcy because of tariffs, but it almost certainly won't be the last. I wrote Tariffs from the U.S.-China trade war are likely to accelerate the Retail Apocalypse in May 2019. That didn't happen then, but it looks like it's happening now. Sometimes I wish I wasn't right.

I'm finishing with a local angle on this story from CBS News Detroit, At Home retail chain files for bankruptcy.

Home decor and furniture retailer, At Home, is filing for bankruptcy. The retail chain has more than 200 locations in the United States.

Two of those locations are not just in Michigan and Metro Detroit, but in Oakland County. I think the one in Troy is in an old Sears location. That's not a good omen, but no Michigan locations are on the store closing list.

Erik mentioned Kohl's in his video. They're next. Stay tuned.

'SNL' celebrates Mother's Day 2025

Happy Mother's Day! I'm celebrating with highlights of last night's Saturday Night Live, beginning with Trump Mother's Day Cold Open.

A mother's day message from Kenan Thompson, Bowen Yang and Marcello Hernández gets interrupted by President Donald Trump (James Austin Johnson).

Of course Donald "Hoover Cleveland" Trump would make it about himself. At least the viewers got the return of Cecily Strong to play Jeanine Pirro. As I wrote two days ago, "Break out the w(h)ine!"

The Mother's Day celebration continued with Walton Goggins Monologue.

First-time host Walton Goggins talks about his character in The White Lotus and becoming a sex symbol in his 50s before dancing with his mom for Mother's Day.

That was fun, sweet, and short. I like all three!

Follow over the jump for Weekend Update and selected skits.

Lydic, Colbert, Meyers, and Kimmel take closer looks at the first American Pope for Flashback Friday

Happy Flashback Friday! I set up today's post in the middle of 'Conclave' — fiction vs. reality, when I wrote "I expect I'll return to the topic once the real conclave elects a new Pope." That happened yesterday with the election of Leo XIV. Without any further ado, I begin the videos with The Daily Show's First American Pope Makes History and MAGA Catholics Already Have Issues.

Desi Lydic has the latest from the Vatican after the announcement of the first American pope, Leo XIV, including the world's reaction to a Chicago-style pope and Fox News immediately yelling at him to speak English. Plus, Michael Kosta celebrates America's conclave win.

The Pope told off JD Vance? I like him already.

Unlike Michael Kosta, Stephen Colbert is Catholic, and he weighed in with White Smoke! | The Chicago Pope | Melania Absent While Donald Handles First Lady Duties.

The new Pope is an American from Chicago, and Melania Trump is M.I.A. so her husband has taken on tasks traditionally managed by the First Lady.

"Pope-S-A! Pope-S-A! Pope-S-A!" and "Daa prayers" — classic. On the other hand, Stephen repeating Desi Lydic's line about "English being good enough for Jesus" is enough to bring out my inner pedant to say "Well, actually, Jesus probably spoke Aramaic," complete with pushing up my glasses.

As for the First Lady being at the White House for a total of two weeks out of the first 100 days, I'm not surprised. I wrote Melania Trump prefers Trump Tower to the White House more than eight years ago. Some things haven't changed.

Before I move on, the nomination of Casey Means to be Surgeon General after Dr. Janette Nesheiwat withdrew shows two things; first, the influence of RFK Jr. remains strong, and, second, things can get worse. I can say the same about the replacement of Ed Martin with Jeanine Pirro as Interim U.S. Attorney for D.C. Break out the w(h)ine!

It wouldn't be a closer look post without Seth Meyers, so here's New Pope Criticized JD Vance; Conclave Upstages Trump's Underwhelming U.K. Trade Deal: A Closer Look.

Seth takes a closer look at Donald Trump announcing a meaningless trade deal with the United Kingdom, which is the first deal he's reached after claiming he already had 200, and him getting upstaged by the new pope.

Donald "Hoover Cleveland" Trump deserved to be upstaged. I'm not so sure about UK Prime Minster Keir Starmer, who I mentioned here for the first time since his election, although he was boring. I hope he feels like his country got something out of the deal. Hoover Cleveland probably does; he might buy a Rolls-Royce because of it.

I close the video portion of today's post with Jimmy Kimmel's Trump Reveals First Trade Agreement, MAGA Nuts Lose Minds Over New Pope & MTG’s Dumb-assery.

A new Pope was selected and he’s American, thousands of worshippers gathered in St. Peter’s Square to welcome the new holy father, right wing social media is losing its collective mind because the new Pope cares for the poor and the sick and the plight of immigrants, Trump announced his first trade deal today with the UK, British Prime Minister Keir Starmer was not able to be at the White House but he did call in to kiss some ass, Trump blamed Pete Buttigieg for all of the issues at Newark Airport, several of Pete Hegseth’s personal passwords have been compromised by cyberattacks, Klan Mom Marjorie Taylor Greene put on a magnificent display of dumb-assery, Trump has an important Mother’s Day message, and Jimmy’s wife Molly gives a helpful hint for how to make this the best Mother’s Day ever.

Not only did the new Pope criticize Vance, he criticized Hoover Cleveland. I like him even more. Speaking of criticism, fake Starmer was a lot more entertaining than the real one. So was Representative Melanie Stansbury, who showed that Hoover Cleveland isn't the only politician who can be fooled by a doctored photo and then insist they weren't fooled. "Who you gonna believe, me or your own eyes?" was a lot funnier when Chico Marx said it.

Because of the criticism of VP Vance combined with the election of the Pope, today's retrospective covers last year's most read shares of blog posts on social media about the 2024 election I haven't already covered. Follow over the jump.

Meyers, Lydic, and Kimmel take closer looks at meeting with Canadian Prime Minister on Throwback Thursday

Happy Throwback Thursday! Before I take a look back at last year's blogging, I'm sharing Carney Tells Trump Canada "Not for Sale," Trump Offends Catholics with AI Pope Image: A Closer Look from Seth Meyers.

Seth takes a closer look at Canada's prime minister, Mark Carney, telling Donald Trump that Canada will never be the 51st state.

Time for me to repeat my crackpot idea about incorporating Canada into the U.S. from Meyers, The Daily Show, and Kimmel take closer looks at Trump's designs on Greenland and Canada.

I'd only be in favor of that if each Canadian province were admitted as the 53rd through 62nd states after Washington D.C. and Puerto Rico. That's only slightly more likely than "a new constitution that replaces the republic with a constitutional monarchy and invite[s] Meghan Mountbatten-Windsor to be Queen." Monkeys will fly out of my butt first.

I amended that with "maybe not Prince Edward Island; they might have to rejoin Nova Scotia first." Also, anyone who thinks Canadians are nice, polite people have never seen them at a hockey game!

The Daily Show examined the meeting in Canada PM Carney Friend-Zones Trump & Real ID Brings Out the Karens the night before.

Desi Lydic recaps Trump's oblivious reaction to getting friend-zoned by Canadian Prime Minister Mark Carney and prepares for a summer of s***ty air travel as the Real ID deadline approaches and Newark Airport spirals into more chaos.

"You never met her, because she lives up in Canada — oh, that excuse doesn't work." That sounds familiar — "my girlfriend goes to another school/was in summer camp with me/lives in Canada, so you don't know her. I resemble that last remark; the ex-girlfriend I write about the most was living in Canada while we were dating." As for the rest of the segment, I'm glad I got Real ID two years ago and the crash in January was only the beginning of problems with air travel.

I close the above the jump part of this post with Jimmy Kimmel's monologue, Trump Makes Hollywood Great Again & Canadian Prime Minister Shuts Down Becoming 51st State.

The stars came out for the annual Met Gala last night and there were many creatively-preposterous outfits on display, Jimmy has thoughts on people using the word “giving,” Trump met with new Canadian Prime Minister Mark Carney at the White House, he is planning to slap a 100% on any movies filmed outside the United States, Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent might need to be unplugged and plugged back in, Trump had a press conference to announce that the 2027 NFL Draft will take place on the National Mall in DC, he signed an executive order aimed raising awareness for mental health, Skype is now in internet heaven, and in honor of Teacher Appreciation Day we give Americans the chance to apologize to their teachers.

Donald "Hoover Cleveland" Trump's proposal to assess 100% tariffs on movies produced overseas will hurt Canada, especially Vancouver, who benefits from American studios shooting films and TV shows there, as I described in Vox explains 'Why your favorite movies fake their locations' plus the Leo Awards. That might not work out the way Hoover Cleveland thinks it will. I might get to that later. In the meantime, follow over the jump for a retrospective of last year's most read comedy posts about the 2024 election where Hoover Cleveland was not the focus, just to remind my readers of the alternative.

Stewart, Meyers, Colbert, and Kimmel take closer looks at Trump's first 100 days for Wayback Wednesday

Donald "Hoover Cleveland" Trump's second administration just passed its first 100 days, so it's time for a look back beginning with Jon on Trump's First 100 Days: Destroying America's Reputation, Economy, & Leverage on The Daily Show.

Jon Stewart takes a look at Trump’s first 100 days: from plummeting approval ratings to unfulfilled promises on immigration, health, and the economy, to destroying his reputation as a shrewd negotiator with China and Ukraine[.]

"Suck it, Herbert Hoover!" That's yet another reason for me to call him Hoover Cleveland, although Hoover wasn't unpopular until after the Great Depression hit. That took a year; we're not waiting that long.

Hoover Cleveland claiming things are going great because he's making bank while posting record low poll numbers is enough to repeat what I wrote in George Santos sues Jimmy Kimmel and Trump sells sneakers, "[H]e has long had a very bad case of 'L'État, c'est moi.' As far as he's concerned, he is the country. He's also the worst president..." I may have more opportunities to connect those two thoughts.

I'm letting davidarcherd9868's comment on the video speak for me about what the economy.

Donald Trump promised that if I voted for Kamala Harris, I would experience the worst economy in recent American history. Turns out, he was right. I voted for Kamala Harris and am experiencing the worst economy in recent American History.

I voted for Harris, so I can say it's not my fault. On the other hand, I'm repurposing what I wrote at the end of John Oliver examines RFK Jr. & HHS, "Trump supporters like the Archdruid and his readers actually approve of what he's doing. I have another post planned about them."

Before I move on, I've been warning about China restricting exports of rare earth elements for years. I wish I were more surprised that China followed through.

Follow over the jump for more monologues about Hoover Cleveland's first 100 days.

'SNL' laughs at Trump's tariffs and stock market crash

I closed the body of 'Star Trek: Strange New Worlds' for First Contact Day, a holiday special with a program note.

In the meantime, Stay tuned for the highlights of tonight's Saturday Night Live. Let's see how they make tariffs and a stock market crash funny.

Watch Trump Tariff Cold Open to find out.

President Donald Trump (James Austin Johnson) addresses his tariffs and their impact on the stock market during a speech.

That explanation of the tariff equation made about as much sense as the real one and was a lot more fun. Also, James Austin Johnson's Donald Trump will be very disappointed to find the real McDonald Island is a cold place inhabited by penguins, not a tropical paradise with fast food. That's ironic since my original nickname for Hoover Cleveland was The Penguin. Weekend Update acknowledged that fact in Trump Tariffs Cause $6 Trillion Loss, Tesla Stock Plummets 10%.

Weekend Update anchors Colin Jost and Michael Che tackle the week's biggest news, like Trump imposing worldwide tariffs.

Six trillion dollars lost in one week? Yikes! Speaking of lost money, the next segment featured Retail Apocalypse news, Hooters Files for Bankruptcy, Subway Unveils Footlong Doritos Nachos.

Weekend Update anchors Colin Jost and Michael Che tackle the week's biggest news, like a 1-year-old eating his grandfather's ashes.

Hooters' bankruptcy deserves more than a one-liner declaring the chain's business model a bust, so I plan on blogging about it tomorrow or Tuesday. Stay tuned.

Follow over the jump for the rest of last night's highlights.

Kosta, Colbert, and Meyers take closer looks at tariffs on Flashback Friday

Yesterday's bad news was tariffs and, of course, tariffs were the story that stuck around. The Daily Show was among the shows that featured them as the topic of their monologues. Since it had the best preview image, I'm sharing Trump’s Tariffs Send Markets Plunging and Penguins Waddling to a Trade War first.

Michael Kosta recaps Trump's tariffs fallout, from a stock market crash to cabinet officials taking to the airwaves to cheerlead the move. Plus, Grace Kuhlenschmidt checks in on the penguins who now find themselves in a trade war.

Imposing tariffs on a territory inhabited only by penguins was the funniest thing about this mess. It shows that Hoover Cleveland and whoever was actually doing his work just went down a list and assigned tariffs without checking to see if any people actually lived there. *Eye roll* I'd say we're living in Idiocracy except that's science fiction that takes place in the 26th Century. We're really living in a kakistocracy, "government run by the worst, least qualified, or most unscrupulous citizens." How about all three?

Speaking of "the worst, least qualified, or most unscrupulous citizens," the title of Stephen Colbert's monologue was Trump Jets Off To Watch Golf After Triggering Global Market Meltdown | No Tariffs On Russia.

President Trump's tariff announcement, which sent stocks into a nosedive and enraged America's allies around the world, mysteriously excluded one major country: Russia.

No tariffs on Russia? I'm not surprised. As I wrote yesterday, "Maybe it's good for his fellow billionaires, including Vladimir Putin, his partner in a bad bromance. I have long had my suspicions." This just reinforces them.

My wife and I watched both Colbert and Seth Meyers, who examined the situation in Trump's Insane Tariff Plan Tanks Stock Market, Risks Economic Collapse as Prices Rise: A Closer Look.

Seth takes a closer look at Trump implementing massive tariffs on almost every country in the world, raising prices for American consumers, escalating a pointless trade war with allies and pushing the economy into a self-inflicted meltdown.

Seth mentioned his wife's shopping list, which reminds me that my wife went shopping at Costco yesterday. She said it reminded her of the early days of the pandemic, when everyone was buying toilet paper, including her. Doom spending, anyone?

I close this portion of the post with the cold open of The Late Show, The World Reacts To Trump's Tariffs.

The president thinks his man-made economic disaster is going "very well."

He would think so. In reality, we're partying like it's 1929.

Follow over the jump for a retrospective of the top posts from last year featuring late-night talk-show hosts examining Donald "Hoover Cleveland" Trump's second term so far to observe Flashback Friday.

Colbert, Kosta, and Meyers take closer looks at tariffs, Wisconsin, and Cory Booker

It's been a minute since I compiled the monologues of the late-night talk show hosts, so I'm returning with Stephen Colbert laughing at Trump Risks Historic Economic Damage | Musk Crushed In Wisconsin | Sen. Booker's Marathon Speech so he and his audience don't have to cry.

President Trump announced new tariffs which economists warn could plunge the world into a depression, Wisconsin voters overwhelmingly rejected Elon Musk's preferred candidate for the state's Supreme Court, and Senator Cory Booker spoke for a record-breaking 25 hours on the Senate floor in protest of Trump's actions.

I call Trump Hoover Cleveland because he was the first president since Herbert Hoover to leave the Oval Office with fewer Americans employed than when he entered. His tariffs could repeat that. The only thing that could save him is that he's doing it so early in his second term. Still, it wasn't necessary for the good of the country. As I wrote in Forever 21 files for bankruptcy and will close all U.S. stores, a tale of the Retail Apocalypse and repeated in CNBC explains 'What’s Scaring Americans Into Shopping More':

If the U.S. does go into recession this year, it won't be because of internal economic forces, but because of government interference, which normally tries to cushion against economic downturns. Biden piloted the U.S. economy to a soft landing, then Hoover Cleveland tries to crash the plane anyway!

I'm not even sure it's good for Hoover Cleveland, although he might think so. As I wrote in George Santos sues Jimmy Kimmel and Trump sells sneakers, "he has long had a very bad case of 'L'État, c'est moi.' As far as he's concerned, he is the country." Maybe it's good for his fellow billionaires, including Vladimir Putin, his partner in a bad bromance. I have long had my suspicions.

Michael Kosta at The Daily Show covered the same stories with the assistance of Desi Lydic, but scrambled their order, in Trump Launches "Liberation Day" Tariffs & Cory Booker's Speech Breaks Senate Record.

Michael Kosta recaps surprising wins for the Democrats, including a victory in the Wisconsin Supreme Court race despite Elon Musk's financial interference, and a record-breaking 25-hour speech by Cory Booker. Plus, Trump launches his "Liberation Day" tariffs, and Republicans scramble to supply cover.

Since Kamala Harris lost, I've been wondering who would step up to be the next leading candidate for the 2028 Democratic Presidential nomination. Cory Booker might have just made his move.

I conclude with Seth Meyers' Musk and Trump Lose Big in Wisconsin After Spending Millions to Buy Votes: A Closer Look.

Seth takes a closer look at the richest man in the world, Elon Musk, trying to buy a seat on the Wisconsin state Supreme Court.

Can Elon Musk buy an election?

I'd like to think Democrats still have the turnout advantage in off-year elections they've had since the Supreme Court overturned Roe v. Wade. Hoover Cleveland won states like Wisconsin and Michigan through "bullet ballots" — people voting for him but no one else. They didn't vote for downballot contests and aren't likely to vote in an election where Trump is not on the ballot. That reminds me of an answer to the question I asked in I ask The Archdruid and his readers 'Can you show us on the doll exactly where the educated professionals hurt you?' The answer is turn against Republicans and deny them downballot victories. I hope that happens tomorrow in Wisconsin and other states where there are off-year and special elections.

I got my wish. The answer to "can Elon Musk buy an election?" was "NO!"

I know I promised a retrospective for Throwback Thursday, but I decided I would catch up on my sleep, so I ran out of time. Definitely tomorrow for Flashback Friday, when I don't have to go to work. Stay tuned.

CNBC explains 'What’s Scaring Americans Into Shopping More'

I wrote "I should go on recession watch again" in Forever 21 files for bankruptcy and will close all U.S. stores, a tale of the Retail Apocalypse. To that end, I'm sharing CNBC explaining What’s Scaring Americans Into Shopping More.

Retail sales are holding up, but consumer confidence is slipping. A rising share of Americans are making purchases not out of want, but out of worry. This trend, called "doom spending," is driven by fears of higher prices and supply disruptions. While it may offer a short-term sense of control, it's happening alongside rising debt and financial strain and could set the stage for a sharper slowdown ahead. Watch the video above to learn more about why Americans are spending more amid growing economic concerns.

CNBC shows it's also on recession watch with this video, so I'm in good company. It also points out that the current round of "doom spending" will shore up the economy in the short run, holding off a recession, but could result in a recession when it abates. If so, I'll blame Hoover Cleveland.

If the U.S. does go into recession this year, it won't be because of internal economic forces, but because of government interference, which normally tries to cushion against economic downturns. Biden piloted the U.S. economy to a soft landing, then Hoover Cleveland tries to crash the plane anyway!

Among other things, the threat of tariffs prompted my wife and me to buy a new Volkswagen Tiguan before the price went up. That's a major purchase. Just the same, we're very happy with it; it's providing good experiences in addition to being a material object.

That concludes today's episode of recession watch. Stay tuned for the highlights of tonight's Saturday Night Live.

Forever 21 files for bankruptcy and will close all U.S. stores, a tale of the Retail Apocalypse

Today's tale of the Retail Apocalypse comes from The Wall Street Journal, which uploaded How Forever 21 Plummeted From $4B in Sales to Twice Bankrupt two days ago as part of its "What Went Wrong" series.

Forever 21 was once the premier shopping destination for teens who wanted cheap and fashionable clothing. But now, the fast fashion pioneer is filing for its second Chapter 11 bankruptcy. After being bought out by licensing firm Authentic Brands Group and real-estate companies Simon Property Group and Brookfield Property Partners, Forever 21 struggled against Asian e-commerce powerhouses like Shein and Temu.

WSJ breaks down how its own market toppled the fast fashion giant.

I haven't mentioned Forever 21 since Vox explains 'The lies that sell fast fashion' nearly a year ago and blogged specifically about Forever 21 since Company Man asks 'The Decline of Forever 21...What Happened?' — a tale of the Retail Apocalypse three years ago. Company Man Mike composed a list of the chain's liabilities then, which I'm reproducing here.


The Wall Street Journal covered all of these, then added competition with Shein and Temu. As I wrote just before Forever 21 filed for bankruptcy the first time, "until Americans, especially young women, change their fashion tastes, they will just buy fast fashion online..." That happened. The best I can say is that Amazon isn't to blame this time.

The Wall Street Journal did not emphasize that Forever 21 would close all U.S. stores, but NBC News made that its headline in Forever no more. Iconic American retailer to close its doors.

Forever 21, known for trendy fast fashion pieces, has filed for bankruptcy. The final sales in its stores are offering steep discounts as the company liquidates its assets. As NBC News’ Brian Cheung reports, in part the company cites pressure from online Chinese retailers for its demise.

The consumer sales figures remind me that I should go on recession watch again. If the U.S. does go into recession this year, it won't be because of internal economic forces, but because of government interference, which normally tries to cushion against economic downturns. Biden piloted the U.S. economy to a soft landing, then Hoover Cleveland tries to crash the plane anyway!

I close with A look at fast fashion and consumer behavior as Forever 21 closes all U.S. stores from KCAL News.

Asit Sharma, The Motley Fool senior analyst, discusses the downfall of Forever 21.

Neither Company Man Mike nor The Wall Street Journal mentioned the effects of the pandemic on consumer behavior as a cause of Forever 21's travails, so Asit Sharma added another factor to its failure.

That concludes today's tale of the Retail Apocalypse. Stay tuned for the Vernal Equinox on the last day of the blogging year.

Meyers, Colbert, Stewart and Kimmel take closer looks at tariffs and Musk taking over government computers

I closed MSNBC explains 'Trump’s tariffs will cost you. Here’s how' by telling my readers "I'm sure I'll revisit this topic and other current events tomorrow through comedy. Stay tuned." That's happening. Watch Seth Meyers as he describes Trump Caves in Tariff Fight with Canada and Mexico; Musk Takes Control of Government: A Closer Look.

Seth takes a closer look at Donald Trump threatening a trade war with multiple countries and plunging the United States into a constitutional crisis.

The good news is that Trump delayed imposing tariffs on Canada and Mexico. The bad news is that Elon Musk has his flunkies messing around with government computers that disburse money and contain employment records. As someone who has worked for the federal government and hopes to start collecting Social Security next year, that's terrifying.

Stephen Colbert joked about both of those topics and more in Trump's Destructive Weekend | Canada Is Booing Us | Tariffs Will Cause "Pain" | Going Back To 1913.

Buckle up as Stephen Colbert goes through the laundry list of disastrous moves made over the weekend by President Trump, which included slapping tariffs on Mexico and Canada and giving Elon Musk access to the Treasury Department's payments system.

Stephen is right; the horse loose in the hospital again is doing so many terrible things at once that it's hard to pick one to focus on. My wife listened to Stephen's list and asked "is this real?" Sorry, darling, they all are. She also observed that Trump has no friends; otherwise he wouldn't treat our friend Canada that way. He also treats his relatives badly; ask Mary Trump.

Jon Stewart and the Daily Show news team had their own take in Jon on Trump’s Trade War, The War on DEI & Myth of “Meritocracy” | The Daily Show.

Jon Stewart examines Trump's attacks on trans people, Canada, and DEI as his first presidential orders of business and asks: How is that making America great again? Plus, the Best F**kin' News Team debate on where they rank in the DEI hierarchy.

Hoover Cleveland's offer to make Canada the 51st state reminds me of what I wrote last month, "I'd only be in favor of that if each Canadian province were admitted as the 53rd through 62nd states after Washington D.C. and Puerto Rico." Well, maybe not Prince Edward Island; they might have to rejoin Nova Scotia first.

As for Sean Duffy — what a step down from Pete Buttigieg — and Pete Hegseth talking about meritocracy, I have only one thing to say: "Only the best people." Yeah, right.

Trump Starts the World’s Dumbest Trade War, Doubles Down on DEI & Turns On California's Faucet

Punxsatawny Phil emerged and declared six more weeks of winter, Kanye West showed up on the Grammys red carpet despite not being invited, Will Smith was in attendance to honor Quincy Jones, NBA Star Luka Doncic somehow got traded to LA in maybe the most shocking move ever, Donald Trump is still posting about all of the water he sent us, the White House is continuing to double down on his nonsensical assumption that DEI caused the tragic air crash last week in Washington, on Saturday Trump issued tariff’s on Canada and Mexico before un-issuing them today, the Wall Street Journal ran an editorial saying his tariff’s would cause the dumbest trade war in history, and a brand new declassified files edition of Lie Witness News.

Jimmy K took a while to get to Hoover Cleveland's stunts with water and the now-postponed "dumbest trade war in history," but now I don't feel bad about giving Groundhog Day and the GRAMMY Awards short shrift. Seth, Jimmy, and Stephen had both covered.

I return to The Late Show to conclude today's post with Elon Musk And His Doge Bags.

Follow the saga of a non-elected billionaire buddy to the president and some boys he knows.

The only way to win this game is not to play.

MSNBC explains 'Trump’s tariffs will cost you. Here’s how'

I promised a topical post today and I'm delivering. Today's topic: tariffs! I begin with Ali Velshi on MSNBC telling his viewers Trump’s tariffs will cost you. Here’s how.

Trump’s tariffs against the United States’ three largest trading partners, Canada, Mexico, and China are now in effect. These taxes levied on imported goods are not paid by the exporting country, but rather a cost that is passed on to the American consumer. Now, products like electronics, cars, denim, home goods, and food could see an increase in price.

Velshi presented a lot of statistics, especially about energy, including oil, and food. A dozen years ago, I found energy and food were among the top two labels on this blog, so of course I found them interesting. I might find them useful. Welcome to blogging as professional development.

MSNBC presented the Canadian side in ‘Utter madness’: Canadian PM candidate slams Trump's tariffs.

Canadian PM candidate Chrystia Freeland joins Morning Joe to discuss how Trump's tariffs are impacting Canada and the U.S.

Chrystia Freeland, who I'm rooting for to replace Trudeau as Canadian PM, says the tariffs are being imposed for no reason. I'd say no good reason, as she stumbled upon what I suspect is the real reason, Trump's designs on Greenland and Canada. Many of the horse loose in the hospital's supporters say he's a "peace president." In reality, he's an imperialist who just has his sights set closer to home.* Vladimir Putin must be pleased. His bad bromance is paying off.

Speaking of closer to home, House member warns Trump's tariffs could impact Michigan auto plants.

A second judge is blocking Trump's federal aid funding freeze. Rep. Haley Stevens, D-Mich., joins Way Too Early to react to this news and to Trump's tariffs on Canada, Mexico and China.

Stevens represents the district literally across the street from me and is a friend of mine on Facebook. She's someone I listen to and I think my readers should, too.

I'm sure I'll revisit this topic and other current events tomorrow through comedy. Stay tuned.

*Hoover Cleveland's threats to buy Greenland, invade Panama to seize the canal, and subjugate Canada and Mexico remind me of a proposal Elon Musk's grandfather supported, the North American Technate. I don't think that's a coincidence. I also think this is a topic for another time.

International water crises for World Water Day from CNA, VOA, and PBS

Happy World Water Day! I begin today's observance of the day with Singapore's CNA reporting World Water Day: Water can be a tool for peace when communities, countries cooperate, says UN.

World Water Day falls on Mar 22. It is marked every year by the United Nations (UN) and the world to inspire positive ripple effects to tackle the global water crisis. The theme this year, amid growing concerns over wars, is “Water for Peace”. The UN says water can create peace or spark conflict, playing a critical role in stability and prosperity. CNA's Julie Yoo has the details.

The statistics Julie Yoo cites for the distribution and availability of fresh water are the same ones I tell my students using a graphic similar to this one from PBS.


It certainly puts things in perspective and I hope it makes an impression on my students.

Yoo's report for CNA emphasized international conflict and cooperation in Asia. Voice of America took a more global view and included private actors indirectly moving water in World Water Day: Corporations Accused of ‘Grabbing’ Water From Global South | VOANews.

There is a growing risk of conflict over water as climate change takes hold, according to the United Nations, which marks World Water Day on Friday. Meanwhile, aid agency Oxfam accuses global corporations of grabbing water from poorer countries to boost profits. Henry Ridgwell reports from London.

Seeing South Africa's water shortage reminds me that the second post I wrote for this day was Cape Town's Day Zero for World Water Day 2018. Same country, different city.

Also, the transfer of water from the global south to the global north reminds me of another story I tell my students, I=P*A*T, "where I is impact, P is population, A is affluence, and T is technology." Affluence increases environmental impact both through the ability to demand resources and the waste that resource use creates. While technology is the only way to reduce the impact from population and affluence through efficiency, it can also make the impact worse. The technologies allowing the international transfer of water through food and other products might just fall into that latter category.

Some water shortages have mostly local causes other than climate change, as PBS News Weekend reported two weeks ago in Mexico City is running out of water. Here’s why and how millions of residents are affected.

Mexico City, one of the world's most populous cities, could be just months away from running out of water. It’s a crisis brought on by geography, growth and leaky infrastructure, all compounded by the effects of climate change. Journalist Emily Green joins John Yang to discuss the situation.

The irony of this is that Mexico City was built on a lake and much of that water is still under the city. That's another story I tell my students, but I'm saving it for another time.

Tomorrow features a traffic jam of topics, with Purim, blog stats, and Louisiana primary all on the agenda. I've skipped Purim before so I might do it again. Stay tuned.